anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
So apparently I’m into choking now
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize