Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Randomize
