I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
