Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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