Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Randomize