I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
That accounts for only three of the penises
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
Randomize
