porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
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