none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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