just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
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I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
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It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
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