in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Randomize
