Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
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