I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
