My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
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