actually, I'm a sock model
You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
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