Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
Randomize
