So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Randomize
