no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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