Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
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