I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Randomize
