it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Barsexuality is the new black.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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