ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
