You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
