woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
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