Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
You left your phone here
Wait...
Randomize
