at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
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