Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
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