I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
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All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
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