He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
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