apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
Is her dick bigger than yours?
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
Randomize
