Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
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he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
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I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
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