there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Randomize
