I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
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