I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
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