your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
Randomize
