If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
Randomize