Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
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