i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
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