? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
Randomize
