ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
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