Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Randomize
