If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
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