You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
