i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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