Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
