Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
Randomize
