i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
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