I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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