just come out here and I will go home with you...
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
