I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize
