just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Randomize
