google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
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The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
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